Self-confidence and self-esteem are not the same thing

Self-confidence and self-esteem are two terms that are often confused. In reality, they have very little in common. It can very easily happen that a colleague who you think has excessively high self-confidence actually has a low level of self-esteem at the same time ...

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What is self-esteem?

Self-esteem is how we value and evaluate ourselves, how we believe in ourselves. It is our evaluation of our own personality as a human being, the perception of our claim to being in this world and in a given space. Self-esteem refers to our acceptance of ourselves and the personal values we perceive. If our self-esteem is high, it means we have a high opinion of ourselves and will not let ourselves be too limited by others. If it is low, we lack respect for our own person and our needs, which we often overlook. Seldom will something satisfy us.

What is self-confidence?

Self-confidence, on the other hand, refers to the trust we have in certain areas and aspects of our lives. We can feel very confident when, say, we are standing on a stage, or, alternatively, when we have to propose a solution to a specific problem or manage other people. Self-confidence is often built in connection with our work and other achievements. A completely banal example: if you win a cake baking competition several times in a row, you will probably build a high level of self-confidence in the field of baking. Try to add your own example ...

Success and personal satisfaction

People often confuse self-esteem with self-confidence. Think of all the celebrities who are unhappy with their lives, even though they have won several Oscars or Grammy Awards. For many years they have excelled in a certain area of ​​life and enjoyed positive feedback in return: this has had a positive effect on their self-confidence but their self-esteem has remained low. In short, they do not feel happy and fulfilled.

The inability to distinguish self-esteem from self-confidence often sends people on a bad life path so they become estranged from themselves. Although the world can benefit greatly from their hard work, they themselves may suffer internally. Their fear of other people's reaction if they were to ease off means they seek continuous improvement, which can result in burnout or other negative consequences.

Self-esteem meanwhile has been built up since childhood. If, as a child, you felt that you had to be the best at everything for your parents to accept you, this affects you in adulthood. However, it does not mean nothing can be done about it. First of all, it is important to be aware of the differences between the two terms and self-evaluation. This applies whether you are dealing with a certain dissatisfaction in your life or with colleagues in your team. Then is the time to work on self-acceptance and there is no sense in deceiving ourselves: it is likely to be a long journey. But if you start working on yourself and actively change things, it will influence your long-term quality of life and satisfaction.

 

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Article source Psychology Today - a U.S. magazine and online community focused on psychology
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